God has given us no greater gift than the gift of choice. We are not limited to
instincts or simple mechanical responses. We have been give the mighty gift and responsibility of having free will. Sadly it is often abused in our culture and turned into an excuse for selfishness. However when free will is not exercised at all we find ourselves in the throws of detrimental thinking, namely “victim thinking”. When we are in victim thinking mode we blame others and do not take our own responsibility. It is easier at times to do this but it is also very unproductive. As long as I blame another person for my choice I don’t have to take personal responsibility. That may make me feel better at the moment and even justify my anger at the other person but in reality it does not take away my responsibility.
Yes, they may have hurt my feelings, or done something bad or unfair to me. All of us will experience unfairness and injustice at various times in our lives to varying degrees but some of us will over come it, get back on our feet, and recover. Others will not. The reasons are more complicate that I can cover in this short exercise but at least one thing that will help is to not give another person control over your choices. You can make me mad but if continue to stay mad at some point it becomes my responsibility. Maybe I wasn’t willing to forgive and move on…you didn’t do that to me…it was my choice.
It has been said that we are the product of the choices we have made to this point in our lives. That may be a difficult pill to swallow but the good news is if we don’t like were we are we can make different choices and over time, not usually overnight, things will change. One thing is for sure as long as we blame others, don’t take our personal responsibility, and don’t make better choices, things are not likely to change for the better.
Use this card to…
- Not let other people have more power over you than you (and likely they) want
- Remind yourself that you have a choice in any situation
- Remember that you are to take responsibility for whatever choice you make
- Encourage yourself by remembering that making better choices currently will will likely result in better results in the future